distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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