I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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