Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
