Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Randomize
