ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
