hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
