'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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