He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Randomize
