Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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