I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
You know, be my cock's hype man.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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