i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Randomize
