When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
