your parents love me but you hate me
You really coming over, don't trick.
so explain again why im purple
no
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
