508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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