even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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