My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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