Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
