Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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