At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
