I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Randomize
