The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
