I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
