Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Randomize
