Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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