New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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