Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize