it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Randomize
