So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
