And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
