The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
