Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Randomize
