they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Please don't give away my fajitas
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
