he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
