At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
