I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
