Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
