How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
