HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize