I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
