So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
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