Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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