I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
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