Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
