Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
we're making bets on your personal life
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
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