And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
