And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
