Don't you send me to vm
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
