He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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