mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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