i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
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