somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
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